little ankles

Every day now, I take my sister to receive brain radiation. She gets locked into a mask and affixed to a table, a box is lowered over her head, and she squeezes her eyes closed while a searing light steals what’s left of her cognition. And in turn, perhaps, extends her life by a few months. […]

indelible ink

I finally reached my sister’s hospital room on the night of Christmas Eve, in the year that I was 24, she 28. Her head was a swollen mess of bruises and stitches and blood and hair. I’d caught a ride with a stranger to find the girl I’d loved for all these awful years so close to gone that […]

The Westons, part I

Around the age of 13 I was sent off to live with the Westons, the result of Mum deciding I was too much to handle. Which isn’t a slight to Mum. I actually was. Like, even for myself. I’d taken to hanging around with a strange group of friends. Strange in that they were kids, […]

other places

I’m not sure what it means when something unknown and unexpected feels familiar instead. For all my livelong life, I’ve been propelled by some strange conflagration of nervous energy. A certain run-and-hide dynamic that leads me, time and again, into the arms of safely dangerous men. Which is perhaps where I’ve found myself again, except […]

anyone

              why are you already a home to me   and why was walking in on you, asleep on the couch to the left like walking through a dream i’d had as a child of the woman I would one day become   the taste and smell of your breath […]

off-ramp, seven

Now that we are at the boarding house Sunny is a not-Sunny. He leaves often and never takes me and pre-dawn comes back to a heavy sleep from which he can’t be woken. “Who are you?” I whisper to his hulking form when I am sure it has reached its slumberdepths. “Tell me what you […]

in danny’s sandbox

So it’s on Facebook this morning that I find out Stevan’s brother is dead. And it’s one of those moments that doesn’t make contact. I read the post several times, trying to make sense of it. But it’s too sudden and I’m not ready. I’m not ready for my childhood friend to have lost his brother. […]