the throwbar

Oh how she grows and changes at every turn, how her limbs and spine lengthen or shrink depending on her conditions, and how we love, or try to love, her inability to rest, that great instigator of drama, and trauma, and pain and tears, which then rise from her in great lunatic waves of laughter and […]

on exoskeletons

Because I find a blue embroidery tulle wedding dress at the thrift store and can’t tell whether it is hideous or magnificent, and because it fits me so lovingly, and because, more than any of it, I suppose, I am just the right amount of me, I end up at a dinner party hosted by the […]

Le Désespéré

so i’m at an art exhibit with yet another man and we agree to walk along separate walls, because i don’t want his thoughts interrupting mine, and he’s standing across the room from me when i turn and realize he has the exact same build as the photojournalist, even the back of his head looks like his, […]

hidden

He got mad at her last night and called her a liar and she felt it a little unfair, given the black lights with which she filled his bedroom for his homecoming. Given the masquerade mask and lingerie she donned, not to mention the knee socks with cute little bows, the stilettos. Although he took his […]

he & i

Last night I notice that my 14-year-old son has posted a new profile picture on Facebook, where he claims to be a 20-year-old simply to gain access to what he terms an outmoded world. The photo is from the last day of summer, on which we summited a 14,000 foot peak, climbing up the backside and endangering our […]

holding back

Very early on, I noticed how one side of Bruno’s mouth would draw up in a sneer when he wasn’t paying attention. For all of his carefully manicured self-possession, this was, at first, the only tell to his unrefined character. It was for the rest of that character to show up that I waited. “He’s […]

the photographer’s proverb

“Are you going to be writing about this?” he asks. “Do you want a notepad?” He’s teasing, of course, but no, I  don’t need a notepad. “That’s not how it works,” I tell him. He raises an eyebrow, mock arrogant. This one loves to challenge me. At times, his behavior even borders on being rude, but […]